Have you heard me say, “You are not alone”?
I say that to let you know that it’s okay if you need help, or don’t have all the answers, but your journey is yours. My journey is mine, and we must walk it alone, but together.
That is one of the most difficult things to realize.
As an adult it's time to let go of all of the excuses we use that keep our life as we know it. We know how to live like we are, and it can seem easier to just keep on going, (even if we don't like the consequences). It's comfortable in some way.
Instead of moving on from the people who keep hurting us, changing things that need to be changed, we keep our comfortable old habits and get more of what we don't want.
I don't like the sounds of change any more than you do because more often than not, it's us who needs to change, not them, and sometimes change means making tough decisions and coming face to face with the things we'd rather just forget.
Forget is not healing nor resolution.
When we feel this way, it’s a white flag flying to remind us that we do not have to be at war with ourselves, or others. It's an opportunity to finally pause and receive the truth. Maybe reconnecting with what's going on will help you decide where to go, but coasting, or continuing to make the same choices that got you here will not bring you to a better place.
Some losses will be felt forever, that’s okay. We all have things in our life that have hurt us, things we can never explain like abuse or, in my case, we’ve lost a few babies before they were born. The loss of a child is a terrible thing to live with, but if we lived in the pain of it every day we would make decisions that not only keep us pained, but grow the pain and make us weak.
There is a way to take that feeling and use it for good, but if we ignore the truth of our life it gives power the things that make things worse, (and that builds pressure that eventually blows up and creates new real problems that are much worse than the original ugly mess).
Sometimes we feel sorry for ourselves or dread the holidays yet never pause to contemplate why this is happening, (again)? How can things change if we don’t know our own role in the situation?
That's the first step. Listen to the beat of your own heart. Write your thoughts about this and truly connect with the feelings you have around what you write. Connect with your heart and you will not feel alone, even when you are.
My name is Brookh Lyons. What is your biggest challenge for the New Year? What are you excited about next year? If you would like some help with that click here for a free consultation. I am accepting new clients in January.