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Lesson 18: Why do I keep having to re-learn Focus?

My Spirit knows.

Dear Reader, Like you, I'm on a journey of listening to my heart more, finding & focussing on what's truly important to me and my family, and letting go of the fluff and sticky crap that holds me down. These are the lessons I'm learning every day. I hope you can relate. Love Brookh

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It’s a mistake to believe that once I learn something it’s mine and that I will be perfect ‘at it’ forever. The truth is that we will all be re-learning and reminded of the same things over and over again during our lifetime because life is actually really simple, we make it complicated. That’s normal but I’m not always a fan of normal ;-) 

The trick is allowing the reminders to be okay, even though it’s frustrating.

Today I am noticing Focus. Again.

Very often I’m reminded in subtle ways to focus on what's happening right now and to be mindful of the end game so that I can focus our direction toward that. I know my will is not always the plan, but I believe that my steps are blessed and redirected, so I’ve gotta take steps. 

Yesterday I was part of a wonderful online conversation with incredible young mommas.

I wanted to write to them … stop! 

Stop worrying about what's on your phone, stop answering the texts, checking Facebook. Don't Instagram your child peddling their first bike ….just be there (present) as your children grow up. 

Why?

Because in all this stuff that makes us busy... important things get lost. Connection simply can not be made virtually. Deep loving connections are made face to face so

BE THERE in mind, body and spirit.

When they look up to see if you’re watching (which they ALWAYS DO. Even my 13 year old said the other day, “you were on your computer during my whole practice”… I wasn’t because I know it’s important to him that I watch, but if I truly needed to do some work, I would have told him before practice that “I’m sorry but I have to get this done, I’ll look up often I promise” and do that. But I didn’t and I must have been looking down all the times when he looked up.)

See, it was a message; my chance to re-FOCUS on what TRULY needs to be done to be sure my son knows he is safe (ie. I am truly present for him). 

Not get annoyed - get present.

My kids are teenagers now and now I REALLY know that there will always be a chance to do the things I've always wanted to do.

What is our hurry? 

Who are we trying to prove ourselves to? 

What are we losing because of that?

If I am focused and I know what I want the outcome to be, then even when I get caught up in the things going on around me, I can come back to what's important and when I’m with these kids and my partner, (who I adore), nothing else matters more than then seeing, feeling and knowing that I am available … cause that’s what I want. 

(What do you want?) 

As I sat today reading a new book I realized that I'm sitting here alone because my kids are teenagers and developing their own lives and they don't need me to be there physically all the time anymore. It's okay. If you know my story, you know that I was not always this way and I changed a lot. Now I have developed beautiful relationships with my children and my son was free to say, “mom you were on your computer” because we talk about expressing our needs, knowing what we want, understanding that we are unique and that compassion has a part in everything we do. 

It is working out well and we have outstanding children but if I knew how fleeting and how quickly the time would rush by, I would have spent more time watching them and less time about how it looks when I don’t respond to a message right away, (and all the other things I do so others will like me and so I'll feel good about myself).

I find great peace in knowing that everything happens for our greater good, so I am not bothered by the time I didn’t spend focused on the outcome; it can all be used to create more goodness into our lives, but I would still put down what ever was distracting me and focus on them more. 

I’d focus on ME more. 

I’d have remembered that staying present would have helped me MORE in the long run to make decisions that lead me to where I wanted to get to, or closer anyway.

I have every day to 'be there' if they want my help and to show them by my example that they are good enough right now, and that change is necessary and good. 

Focusing on right now with the future in mind is a gift. 

Don't waste it. And don't keep it either. 

Open and create your focus now and enjoy it!

If you can relate or want guidance, reach out or let me know in the comments below. 

Love Brookh

Hi! I'm Brookh - a wife, mother and life-adventurer who lost her way, and reset. As a Women's Empowerment coach I am committed to helping women like you to remember yourself and find your great value between work, volunteering and family-time so that you have deeper, more real, and long-lasting connection with your own needs and your loved-ones by doing what works best for your individual journey. We all have ideas of our 'Dream Life', but yours doesn't look like anyone else's, and that's a good thing. Today reach for your dreams with purpose and direction.

Learn more about Fine Lioness, Dr. Brookh Lyons HERE. She is a mother, wife, healer, coach and workshop instructor on a quest to walk up that mountain, lean over the edge and ROAR at the top of her lungs. It's time to figure stuff out and become the best darn people we can.

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