When we know what's going on around us we are far more capable of being successful because although surprises always happen in a family environment, the more prepared we are otherwise, the more at ease we can be when things get a little crazy.
It's the same for our kids and they depend on us to model and teach them these subtle life skills.
As our kids get older their responsibilities change. First, we say "bring your diaper so we can get you changed" and then quickly we find ourselves saying "put your car keys in the bowl so I can move your car in the morning". Sometimes it feels tough to keep up, but we manage.
One way we can help our kids become more successful is to allow them the space to learn habits they will keep practising in pursuit of a successful life.
Research backs this idea and while there are countless ways our children will have an opportunity to learn how to succeed and fail (hopefully without our micromanagement), it is always best to allow them space to develop their own system and build their own self-esteem while we remain present (just in case they ask for our guidance).
This is why we regularly invite our children's friends over, and, once a week we have a Family Meeting.
This meeting is an opportunity for all of us to share what's coming up and as we work together as a team to practice communication and cooperation. (Not EVERYONE can be driven somewhere at 4. What are we going to do?) While I could figure this out on my own, often there is a simpler way to accomplish a task that comes up in our discussion. Sometimes I declare my plan (in a hurry) but when I release myself to the group, we usually come together as a unit and find a solution that works for everyone.
Success breeds success.
The Weekly Family Meeting also allows us to build a natural distance from our children that we will all need when they one day leave our home as fully capable young adults. When we have confidence in their ability to navigate the world, we can loosen the reigns and be more at ease.
The How-To details about your Family Meeting are far less important than actually holding the meeting. There may be little to talk about, do it anyway to make sure that permission forms are signed, the ingredients to a special meal are purchased and that your partner is still available to pick up the kids when it’s ‘Girls Night Out’.
A boat will get tossed around in the water when there is no energy behind it. When we have a plan, we know where we're going and even though the path may alter, we are showing our effort by rowing.
Your Family Meeting is the power that sets your boat in motion.
Start rowing. Keep going.
Keep up the good work, Momma. If you are serious about your confidence and helping your children to succeed as they grow up, sign-up for The Confident Mom Club waitlist so you know when we open enrollment again. IN the meantime I will send you a powerful tool that I have developed to assess the strength of yoru personal foundation. We are powerful, each on in our own way. We can all be more.
And let me know what your family does to stay organized and connected.
- xo Dr. Brookh
Dr. Brookh Lyons helps mothers become confident and empowered women so they can raise children who can thrive in today's world. If you want the support you need, click HERE and sign up on our waitlist because Femelle, Our Confident Mom Club is opening again soon, or follow Dr. Brookh on Facebook.
Dr. Brookh lives in Green Bay, WI with her husband Dan, their two teenagers and fur-baby named Sophie. She has won - failed, earned her doctorate, been married (twice), run a practice, homeschooled, sent the kids back to school, published a magazine, and so far her children have survived (even FLOURISHED), she is still married (18 years together) and loves life deeply.
"The future has yet to reveal itself so let's enjoy today. THIS moment. THIS life we have today." - Dr. Brookh Lyons